All posts in Personal Things I Pretend You’re Interested In

Look at Yourself.

Hello Wifers!

I’m at home with bronchitis! Yay! But I have good drugs and after five nights of NyQuil I’m looking forward to some serious liquid codeine and a good night of sleep.

I still worked today, but from home, which means that I could occasionally troll the Internets for stuff during the times when I would normally be interrupted by co-workers. Or be interrupting other people from their work. Probably the latter, if I’m being honest.

While trolling, I found this awesome article on Huff Post, written by Treva  Brandon:

“What to do when your Bestie becomes a Bitch”

And I sort of laughed. Then I read it, and with the exception of the line “there are still some of us out there who are mature adults,” the author had me. I have friendships that are 40 years old and going strong, and I’ve had a few big flameouts in the last few years. And it’s sad when it happens, but it happens. People change, situations change, lives change. Anyone who knows me in real life knows I’ve gnawed on my share of my foot, and eaten plenty of crow (goes well with a nice cabernet) so I can’t say I make it easy to stick around. I’m pretty opinionated and can be bossy and interrupt people a lot. I will also eat the last cookie.

The reason the “mature adults” line bothers me is that the implication is if you can’t fix the relationship, someone isn’t being a mature adult. The line is a bit judgy, like “I’m the mature adult and she isn’t, so that’s why it didn’t work.” Newsflash – most people aren’t mature adults in fights. Usually there’s plenty of blame all around.

Facebook is an interesting phenomenon. I love seeing people’s pictures of kids and lives and such, but every once in a while there will be a post that I just think, “Does that person know how that really reads?” There is a whole hell of a lot of judgement, some passive, some aggressive. I’ve seen three posts in the last week from people vaguely referring to a wrong someone else has done them. Is Facebook really the place to air that dirty laundry? Those posts just make me uncomfortable. A recent one referenced someone talking about someone. And I know, in the words of REM, Everybody Hurts. It hurts to have people talk about you, and it’s frustrating, and you want to talk about the injustice of it. But, like Sassy Gay Friend, let’s take a look at ourselves.


I sometimes talk about people.

There. I said it.

Do I like that about myself? No. Do I regret it? Yes. Do I think I’m perfect? OH HELL NO.


But if we’re being honest, it’s human nature. I can tell you for damn skippy sure that people who post about being talked about talk about other people. I’m not saying it’s okay to do it, but I am saying that before we get judgy about people talking about people, or someone being immature in an argument, or not being BFF’s, stop. Think. Acknowledge Thyself. What Would Jesus Do?


Thanks be to the, for this awesome meme.

So Wifers. I’m going to take some more cough drugs and think about being a better person. To the friends who are no more, or aren’t quite as close anymore? I’m sorry for my part of it all, and I love you. There was obviously something there once, so thanks for that time. And to the friends who are still here? You are obviously gluttons for punishment, and I love you for it, you crazy bitches.


A Day in the Wife

Hello, Gentle Readers

The four or five of you who read the blog when it isn’t about Iowa State have probably noticed that I’ve been lax in posting of late. To be honest, I’ve felt a little bit, for lack of a better term, cock-blocked in my writing. There are entertaining things that happen every day, that I think most of you would get a kick out of, but if it’s about any of the schools, quite a few teachers read the blog, and they might get offended. Or call the DHS, because they are mandatory reporters. If I write about family, my family reads it. If I write about work, work people or their spouses read it. If I write about my kids, some of their friends’ parents, OR WORSE, their friends, may read it. I once pissed off one of my neighbors by writing about the feral cats. Years ago, I pissed off a PTA person by writing about a PTA event. I’ve pissed off in-laws, friends, and people who apparently hate Gwyneth Paltrow. Because I give my opinion about things, and as Abraham Lincoln once said, “…you can’t please all of the people all ¬†of the time.”

*sigh* DON’T I EFFING KNOW IT, ABE. Word. Read more…

Another Love Letter to Coaches With Restraining Orders Against Me

I’m pretty sure I’ve vomited it all over social media last weekend, and on the blog, and hey, let’s face it, subtlety is not my thing, so let’s get it all out…

Did y’all hear Iowa State won the Big 12 Championship?

big 12

Oh yes they did, Em-Effers.

Read more…

Random Acts of Kindness

Three things happened in the last 24 hours that are absolutely what I needed, when I needed it. Things in my life are amazing and overwhelming, disappointing and uplifting all at the same time, as they are in many of your lives too, I’m sure. Without boring you with the details, I’ll say that in my writing life I’ve had a couple of disheartening moments in the last week or so, but I found exactly what I need from people in my life to keep me smiling.

First – literal feeding.

I have a friend who is an amazing cook. You know how most people are either really good cooks or really good bakers? This one is the whole package. Last night she thought we should come over to her house for some Chinese Sticky Ribs and fried rice. Um, okay.

sticky ribs.

She fed my family AND gave me a delicious grapefruity-tinged glass of chardonnay. I was in my happy place. No one on the planet could be unhappy with Chinese Sticky Ribs in their mouth. And her husband is adorably snarky and her kids pretty great too. I even like her cat, which is saying a LOT. Read more…